It’s time to Wine Down at The Wine Loft!
Call your friends, get your sitter, do whatever you need to do to make sure you’re hanging out with us Wednesday April 1, 2015.

Each month we give away great prizes, soak up a relaxed atmosphere, chow down on delicious free appetizers and have a really great time… who knew philanthropy could be this fun?!
If you haven’t joined us for Wine Down yet here’s what you can expect:
– $10 at the door goes directly to charity.
– Generous glasses of wine at a great discount.
-Delicious FREE appetizers provided by The Wine Loft (if you haven’t been there yet, you’re in for a real treat).
– Raise more money for the selected non-profit by purchasing raffle tickets and winning great prizes.
-Meet new people (like Richmondmoms Christa and Sarah) and network or grab a quiet spot for you and a friend to enjoy a kid-free night to catch up.

As much as $1,000 is raised each month in just a couple hours at each event at the Wine Loft so feel good about connecting with other parents, family-focused businesses and raising money for a great cause.

In April we raise a glass (and some funds) for the incredible work done by Safe Harbor.

Safe Harbor is the only dedicated sexual and intimate partner violence program in Henrico County. Our mission is to empower survivors of sexual and domestic violence to transform their lives, and to promote healthy relationships for all. SafeHarbor offers comprehensive services for survivors of sexual and/or intimate partner violence including: A 24-hour helpline, children/youth services, community education and training, trauma-informed counseling, court advocacy, emergency shelter and hospital accompaniment. All of our services are confidential and free of charge to anyone seeking help. We are here to create a community filled with happy, healthy relationships. Join us!

Wine Down
At The Wine Loft in Short Pump
April 1, 2015
6:30pm
All funds will be donated to Safe Harbor.

RSVP and invite your friends on Facebook!

For businesses owners who would like to donate a raffle prize, we appreciate you! Please contact us:christa@richmondmom.com.

These events may also be sponsored by businesses owners. If you’re interested in sponsoring a future Wine Down event, let us know. We’d love to hear from you.

Photo via Flickr

Every little girl dreams of the day they will fall in love with a man, move out and have kids – living happy ever after.  Our fairy tales tell of the prince charming and how blissful being in love is. You never think about not getting prince charming but getting just the opposite – the villain. But that is just what happened.

My fairy tale turned out to be a nightmare instead. I could talk about the physical part of the abuse – the routine beatings; the screaming so loud it made the kids run and hide; the time HE tried to run me over with his car – but most physical wounds heal in time.

Much deeper lie the scars that stay forever.

The ones that become a part of you; that change you little by little, until one day you look in the mirror and you no longer recognize yourself. Because you are not you, you have become HIS property. You do as you are told. You don’t argue back. You hang your head and try not to upset him, telling yourself he loves you and it’s your job to make him happy. That it’s normal and if you just do what you’re supposed to then things will be fine. And when its not fine it’s your fault. You tell yourself “I should have known better. If I wouldn’t have taken too long eating lunch I would have had dinner started on time. If I would have taken the baby to the bathroom with me her cry wouldn’t make him angry. If I wasn’t so stupid he wouldn’t call me worthless. If I was a better mother he wouldn’t tell my children that I was worthless, no good and they didn’t have to listen to me – that they were the boss.”

HE turned out to be the villain that destroyed my self esteem and made me believe I had no self worth, tearing me down in front of my children. My children learned to belittle me. I became so isolated from my friends and family I developed a social anxiety. The biggest thing I had to learn about myself while at Safe Harbor was that I had a lot to offer the world and I shouldn’t be afraid to go to a job interview and meet people.

That it was OK to put makeup on and get dressed up.

I had to learn how to feel good about myself and through all the counseling I still second guess myself. I always hold back, not fully trusting anyone, much less myself. Some days are still hard where I think I don’t deserve happiness; that I’m not good enough for anyone to love. My children and I had to be uprooted from our home, from everything we knew, to start over in a shelter, losing all of our things. We left right after Christmas. My boys didn’t even get a chance to ride their new bikes from Santa. HE took them back to the store.

I can never replace some of the things that were lost – my mother’s wedding rings; her purse; the last things she had at the hospital before she passed away. The memories of my children growing up in the only home they knew. It will be a long road to rebuild and heal from the damage and pain that was caused. I share my story not only for my own personal healing. I am here as a mother. I’m here to show my boys that what HE did to us was wrong. That women are not property. They deserve respect. That when you hurt people, you are punished.

I’m here to show my little girl she is beautiful and deserves to be treated as the princess she is and it’s not normal to be hit and put down.
I am here to stop the cycle and close this chapter of our lives so my children and I can start to heal.
I am here to show HIM he no longer has control and he is not above the law and crimes do not go unpunished. I’m here today because today I am strong.
Today I am ME.
I am my own person.
I no longer belong to anyone.

This story has been told anonymously thanks to Safe Harbor
Learn more about Safe Harbor.
To help Safe Harbor and their incredible mission in a fun (and fashionable) way, join us for Handbags for Hope.

Safe Harbor: A 24 hour helpline for information, support, and resources: 804-287-7877

January has been proclaimed as Stalking Awareness Month. This year marks the 10th anniversary of commemorating this month. It is estimated that up to 6.6 million people are stalked in one year Stalking is a serious issue that disrupts lives in many ways, and often ends in tragic results.

Stalking is commonly defined as “a course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable person to feel fear”.  Stalking is often related to intimate partner violence which often ends in serious or tragic results. Many women who are murdered by current or former intimate partners reported stalking behaviors at some point.

Stalking behaviors include:

• physically watching, staring or spying
• unwanted phone calls, letters, text messages or other messaging
• property invasion/damage
• using another person to stalk you (proxy stalking)
• hidden cameras, GPS devices, spyware

It’s Real

Stalking is real. Fortunately, I have never personally been subject to stalking, but I know women who have dealt with stalking and it is a real threat.  Once a woman is stalked, she no longer feels safe anywhere or any time. She feels robbed of her freedom and is anxious and afraid. Her whole life is turned upside down and inside out.

When my friend was stalked, she was a single woman living alone. She worried about every person she met on the street, added new locks to her doors and windows, and had to change her phone number. When she spoke with police, they said that she must have evidence of the person stalking her. There was no option for a restraining order given the circumstances – yet she lived in fear for months.  Protective orders changed a few years back and are more readily available for stalking victims today – so finding out what’s available for your protection is critical.

Fortunately, my friend’s situation turned out positively when the stalker finally gave up and moved away.

But is he out there stalking someone else today. Is he quietly harassing some frightened woman who doesn’t know where to turn for help? And will he return?

Know the Law and Get Help

It’s important to know your rights and the stalking laws in your state. It is a crime under the laws of all 50 states and the District of Columbia. Being educated on the laws is just one important step in protecting yourself or someone you love.

The Stalking Resource Center offers lots of resources and information for professionals, organizations, and systems to effectively respond to stalking.

Safe Harbor – A Local Resource

Safe Harbor right here in Richmond, VA is also a valuable resource for those being stalked. Don’t avoid seeking help the minute you believe you are being stalked. Help is here! Safe Harbor provides:

• A 24 hour helpline where you can receive information, support, and resources: 804-287-7877.
• Professionals to discuss stalking and intimate partner violence. Call the hotline.

Source: http://safeharborshelter.com/

Thanks again Richmond – for supporting Safe Harbor through the annual cocktail party. What an awesome response!

Safe Harbor’s Annual Cocktail Party raised over $15,000 to support the agency’s work assisting those surviving sexual and domestic violence and promoting healthy relationships and healthy sexuality. Over 100 guests attended the event Friday, November 8, 2013 at Deep Run Recreation Center.

The event featured holiday-themed trees and wreaths available for purchase through silent auction as well as many other silent and live auction items. Live auction items included a trip to Italy, a Vermont vacation, an Outer Banks trip, and tickets to a VIP evening at The Richmond Forum program featuring former UK Prime Minister Gordon Brown.

Richmondmom.com is always in support of resources and outreach like Safe Harbor and we want to thank everyone who supported this annual event. Safe Harbor has been a haven for countless numbers of women in the Richmond area and we applaud their incredible work!

For more information about the event, click here.

Safe Harbor received a $22,300 grant from The UPS Foundation, the charitable arm of UPS. The grant will be used towards the upgrade of technology and equipment along with the costs associated with recruiting, training, supervising and celebrating Safe Harbor volunteers.

Jodi Ottaviano of Safe Harbor Shelter and Kate Hall, founder and previous owner of Richmondmom.com

Safe Harbor’s volunteer program significantly supplements the work of the agency’s twelve paid staff. It would be impossible to provide all essential services, 365 days a year, without a cadre of highly trained volunteers.

• The agency typically has 100 active volunteers deployed across ten volunteer teams.
• They work beside our staff providing direct services to survivors and educating the community about the issues of sexual and domestic violence.
• This grant supports this important program and its immeasurable impact on our community.

“UPS’ corporate values of diversity, community safety, and volunteerism align perfectly with the focus of Safe Harbor’s volunteer program. We are honored to work together with UPS to build a program that meets the needs of survivors of violence and tells the story of the UPS Foundation’s commitment to delivering sustainable solutions to the communities where UPS employees live and work,” stated Safe Harbor Executive Director Kathleen Demro.

Established in 1951 and based in Atlanta, Ga., The UPS Foundation identifies specific areas where its backing clearly impacts social issues. In support of this strategic approach, The UPS Foundation has identified the following focus areas of giving: nonprofit effectiveness, encouraging diversity, community safety and environmental sustainability.

In 2011, The UPS Foundation distributed more than $45.3 million worldwide in grants that benefit organizations or programs such as Safe Harbor and provide support building stronger communities.

“The UPS Foundation is honored to support Safe Harbor’s efforts to empower survivors of sexual and domestic violence to transform their lives, and promote healthy relationships for all,” said Eduardo Martinez, president of The UPS Foundation. “Our goal is to fund powerful programs that make a lasting difference to the global community.”

About Safe Harbor

Safe Harbor empowers survivors of sexual and domestic violence to transform their lives, and promotes healthy relationships for all. The agency was born through the efforts of a St. Mary’s Hospital emergency room nurse who was devastated by the number of domestic abuse victims she treated. As a result, Safe Harbor opened in April 2000. It has grown from an emergency shelter to offering additional critical supportive services including a 24-hour confidential helpline (804-287-7877), community counseling programs for adults and children, community support groups in English and Spanish, court advocacy, hospital accompaniment and community education and outreach services.  For more information, please visit www.safeharborshelter.com or www.facebook.com/SafeHarborRVA.

Everyone is a winner!

Richmondmom.com was so proud to be part of the most recent nTelosCaresRVA non-profit giveaway! The Children’s Heart Foundation (CHF), Safe Harbor, and Talk About Curing Autism (TACA) were the three charities included in our contest this time.

Lisa Ann Setchel from TACA was so excited!

We are happy to announce that our voters chose TACA as their number one choice to receive the largest financial donation! Congratulations to Lisa Ann Setchel and everyone else who works so hard for this non-profit. They received a check for $1,500 from nTelos at the Willow Lawn location on May 9, 2013 during the presentation ceremony. Lisa Ann was momentarily speechless (which doesn’t happen often!) and so appreciative of the donation.

Safe Harbor

But nTelos didn’t stop there.

They also awarded $500 checks each to CHF and Safe Harbor – a nice surprise for these two local non-profits as well.

Richmondmom.com is committed to donating to local community non-profit organizations, and finding ways to help them increase the donations they receive through various channels. nTelos Wireless has been a tremendous supporter of non-profits throughout Virginia, and we are fortunate that they have chosen to work with Richmondmom.com on this important initiative.

We don’t know what they have up their sleeves next, but we know that nTelos Wireless ROCKS and they’ll certainly be back so stay tuned!

How cute are the CHF recipients?

Congratulations once again to TACA – and to CHF and Safe Harbor. They are all winners.

And a special thanks to nTelos Wireless for making it all happen!

Thank you nTelos

Nominate a Single Mom

Safe Harbor is partnering with Cox Media Group and all six local TGI Friday’s locations for a special Mother’s Day promotion.The four local Cox Media Group radio stations (K95 Country, 103.7 the River, Rock 96.5 and Hot 100.9) are seeking nominations for outstanding single moms who will receive a special Mother’s Day lunch and gift bag from TGI Friday’s.

To nominate a special mom in your life, click on the following station names to go to their specific nomination page:

• K95 Country
• 103.7 the River
• Hot 100.9
• Rock 96.5

Eat Dessert for Money!

In addition, all six local TGI Friday’s locations are donating $1 from each dessert sold the week of May 6 to Safe Harbor. This significant donation will make a  HUGE difference in the lives of those served by Safe Harbor. When you eat dessert, Safe Harbor gets money for women who need it most.

So, go eat dessert! It’s for a good cause!

The six area locations are:

• 7023 W BROAD ST
  RICHMOND, VA 23294
  804-672-9477
• 10301 MIDLOTHIAN TPKE
  RICHMOND, VA 23235
  804-330-0203
• 11600 W BROAD ST
  RICHMOND, VA 23233
  804-360-7926
• 4459 LABURNUM AVE
  RICHMOND, VA 23231
  804-236-3860
• HULL STREET
  SWIFT CREEK, VA 23112
  804-763-0553
• 8100 CREIGHTON PARKWAY
  MECHANICSVILLE, VA 23111
  804-559-2426

To learn more or to nominate a single mom, click here.

Photo Source: http://safeharborshelter.com/

Safe Harbor Executive Director Kathleen Demro was one of several speakers at the Virginia Department of Criminal Justice Services 2013 National Crime Victims’ Rights Week Recognition Event. The event was held April 25, 2013 at the Capitol Square.

Ms. Demro focused on how each of us can make a difference in our community by holding offenders accountable and supporting those impacted by crime. Here is a segment of her speech (complete with some unexpected visitors and usual downtown noise).

We are grateful to have participated in the event which included many powerful speakers. To view a photo album of the event, please click here.

This event is held in honor of National Crime Victims’ Rights Week. To learn more about this remembrance, click here.

Thank you nTelos!

You probably remember the fantastic contest with nTelos in December. Three local charities received checks from nTelos Wireless as a result of the contest they sponsored on Richmondmom.com. Now they are doing it again!

nTelos Wireless is teaming up with Richmondmom.com to donate a great gift to one of three great local charities. The “nTelos Cares” event runs through April 24, 2013. It’s a chance for Richmondmom readers to help choose a charity to receive a financial donation from nTelos.

nTelos Cares is donating from $1 to $2,500 to a charity, based on the number of tweets and shares for the contest (more details below). It’s easy; all you have to do is spread the word about the nTelos Cares program via Facebook or Twitter.

It is important to remember:

• Tag ‘nTelos Wireless’ from your posts on Facebook to be counted.
• Use the hastag: #nTelosCaresRVA to be counted on Twitter.

Just “like” or “share” our Facebook post about the program and tag nTelosWireless  (you can also “like” and “tweet” right from this page with our sharing buttons and tag nTelos as indicated below!). Or if you prefer Twitter, “retweet” our tweet using the hashtag:  #nTelosCaresRVA.  For every like, share, or re-tweet with the proper Facebook tag or Twitter hashtag, nTelos Wireless will donate $1 (up to $2,500 total) to the winning charity!

Vote for One Organization to Win

The three (3) charitable organizations included in our contest are listed below. Click on the links to learn more about each one.

1. Children’s Heart Foundation (CHF)
2. Safe Harbor
3. TACA (Talking About Curing Autism)

Contest Entry

Here’s how it works.

1. Click here to choose from our 3 charities and vote for the charity you’d like to see receive a monetary donation from nTelos.
2. Visit our Facebook page to ‘share’ this post with all of your friends, family, colleagues, organizations, and groups – using the nTelos Wireless tag. The more people who ‘share,’ the more money nTelos donates. BE SURE TO USE TAG ‘nTelosWireless’ when reposting and sharing.
3. You can also create a post on YOUR Facebook page that tags both nTelos Wireless and your charity.  In your post, mention the nTelos Cares program and tag +nTelos Wireless plus your preferred charity.
   
4. Tweet this post to everyone you know – spread the word and increase the donation from nTelos! You MUST use the hashtag #nTelosCaresRVA to be counted for the promotion.

That’s it. The more you tweet and share, the more money our charity receives.

So, what are you waiting for? Visit our Facebook page and start sharing. And be sure to vote for your favorite charity to win!

Thanks to nTelos Wireless for making this contest possible.

Contest Rules and Requirements

1. The promotion, which takes place between the dates of April 10, 2013 and April 24, 2013 raises money for a local 501(c)3 charity via social media activity.
2. Any Twitter tweets and/or retweets must include the hashtag #nTelosCaresRVA to be counted for the promotion
3. Facebook shares/likes/promotions must use the tag ‘nTelosWireless’ to be counted.
4. This is a social media/blogger promotion and contestants must utilize Facebook or Twitter as described above to be entered into the contest.
5. The charity with the most votes will win the (amount of financial donation to be determined by nTelos Wireless based on social media).
6. The charity chosen to receive the monetary donation must provide a copy of their IRS letter proving tax exemption status.
7. At the end of the promotion, the charity with the most votes will be selected to receive the monetary donation. However, the donation amount will still be determined by the amount of individual activity on Facebook or Twitter relating to the promotion.
8. nTelos Wireless reserves all rights to cancel the promotion if desired.

A letter from Safe Harbor:

The end of year is a time of reflection, change and gratitude for many of us.  That proverbial ‘turning the page’ of the calendar to a new year gives us all the chance for a new beginning.  That ‘chance’ happens here at Safe Harbor too – the only difference is that the opportunity exists daily.  With just one phone call, the hope to live a life free from violence can turn into a reality. Within a year’s time, we will answer over 3,000 calls on our helpline, talking with those impacted by sexual and domestic violence.  We will shelter 75 adults and children in our safe houses, providing an immediate safe place.  We will advocate for over 1,000 survivors within our counseling spaces.   We will personally hold the hands of over 100 individuals that need emergency medical care because of the abuse they have suffered.  We will reach out to over 5,000 members of the community, providing trainings and education on how we all deserve a healthy relationship. In 2012, our capacity to provide a safe place to live tripled. Our new transitional houses, “Harbor House” and “Hope House” officially opened to accept families transitioning from our emergency shelter.  These families now have the chance to begin a new chapter of their journey.  Two independent, generous donations from within the community made this possible.  The houses are appropriately named, for they provide protection during a time of optimism. Words of hope of our shelter holiday tree   Throughout the year, additional contributions help support these houses, and the families that live in them.  For the last few weeks, my office has been filled with holiday gifts for the children, food for the pantries, and donations to keep the houses clean and comfy.  Thank you for ALL your generosity! December is also a time for many to make their year-end gift to their favorite charities.  I hope Safe Harbor is on your list.  You can ‘turn the page’ for someone right now by making a donation on our website HERE . Your gift can go a long way in helping us to empower survivors to transform their lives. Thank you for caring.  If you would like to hear more about our services, please CONTACT ME.  I wish you all a healthy, happy and hopeful New Year! Jodi Leonard Development Manager