by Richmond dad Jeb Hoge
In my last column, I wrote that road trips were a great, inexpensive, and surprisingly time-effective alternative to airlines. Now I want you to forget all that. OK, not exactly, but sometimes you’ve got a long trip to make, long enough that driving is out of the question (like Richmond to Seattle, for example). Having made at least one family air travel trip every year for the past five years, I’ve found some useful methods for making flights as fun and smooth as possible.
Start by talking up the trip as soon as it’s scheduled. The trick is to have your child make a really personal connection with the destination. Talk about who you’re going to see, where you’re going to stay, and where your child is going to sleep. Get him or her (or them) on the phone with grandparents or cousins. You might find that your kids get so excited about the destination that they’re ready to do ANYTHING you ask when the big travel day arrives.
Add to that excitement by finding a role for your child. Having an itty-bitty piece of responsibility is a big confidence booster. Our older son (five years old) loves to tote a backpack and his own copy of the itinerary and directions…this turns him from a tagalong into the leader of a grand expedition. Let your child help decide what goes into a backpack, like snacks, a favorite cup, and a change of clothes, as well as a few little toys. A favorite stuffed animal may seem a little bulky but makes a nice pillow.
When the travel day arrives, the last thing on your mind is probably buying a toy, but reconsider that once you get to the airport. Most airport gift shops sell toy airplanes in airline liveries. Find one for the airline you’re flying and buy it for your child as a special souvenir. Be sure to open it right away! Flight attendants think it’s cute. I also think that it’s nice for your kids to greet the crew; yes, this has to be timed appropriately (not during the safety briefing, of course), but I think it makes children less likely to be scared of those grownups.
The hardest part, however, comes when you’re on your way. Rather than nestling back with a book and hoping your child stays calm, quiet, and entertained, you need to be interacting a LOT with him or her. It’s all about positive redirection. Look out of the window together, flip through SkyMall, explain what the flight attendants are doing, and just shower your kid with attention. It’s much better than saying “No” or “Stop” all the time. And if you’re lucky, all of the excitement and interaction will lead to a good nap.
Sometimes, though, despite your best efforts, there will be tears. I learned to tell my son to hug me as hard as he can (I actually egg him on) and find some positive redirection while reminding him that the trip will end soon. This is where the early planning and talking about the trip helps; you can ask what your child wants to do when you get there. It’s usually enough to defuse a cranky youngster (especially if snacks are involved). (Also, try to have full sippy cups ready for the descent…drinking helps alleviate ear pressure.)
Once you land, tend to the basics right away. Bathroom stops are obvious, but grab a snack before baggage claim even if you’re headed straight to Grandma’s. Try to make a few minutes to play; say goodbye to friendly people from the flight, look at a map, or count bags on the carousel. Praise your child’s good behavior and just gloss over any bad moments; this should be a moment of pride that your child can savor. Air travel isn’t easy. Kids pick up on adults stressing out in airports. Being told “You did it! I’m so proud of you!” carries so many dividends. Repeat performances should only get better.
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