Lily and her great-grandfather both love Maddie.
Just when you think you have things under control, you find that you don’t!
That seems to be the case when caring for an ailing parent. In previous posts about my father, you will recall that he is suffering from a variety of health issues.
And now?
He has a broken shoulder!
The doctors say that he is not a candidate for surgery — but we already knew that. So we are doing the best we can to “handle with care” and avoid even the slightest movement of the shoulder secured in a sling, until it heals enough to begin some therapy.
We made a heart-wrenching decision to have someone else other than family come in and start providing care for him part-time — he is totally opposed to having her in the house. But, we have no choice. I live 3 hours away and my brothers and sisters all work full-time and have other obligations and families too. So, we went against his wishes to bring in someone to help 5 days each week. We still share weekends and nights.
So, why do I feel so empty and heartless? Why do I feel like I have let him down? Why do I feel like we are not doing enough? And why do I feel guilty?
You’d think after struggling through such a terrible situation with my mother’s Alzheimer’s before she passed away 3 years ago, I would have learned that what’s best for an aging parent is not always what they want.
But I didn’t.
So I worry.
And it doesn’t help at all. It just makes me depressed and sad.
I am open to answers from anyone. Maybe you can help me put this all in perspective. Until then, we will all just try to “keep on keeping on”. Taking it one day at a time. Me, my brothers and sisters, struggling with the solution that works for us and him and makes everyone happy. The elusive answer.
And doing the best we can for the father we love so much.
