You only have a short time to be a Superhero.
One thing I would like parents to know is that your children begin by thinking you wear blue tights, can fly and are capable of making yourself invisible. They depend on you for their food supply, their blankies, their reading time, walks and talks and everything they find wonderful and special. There’s nothing you can’t do and it’s a special time.
You are taller, smarter, wiser, funnier, and more capable and outweigh them by 100 pounds or more.
This is your teaching time.
You have the advantage.
You are the Superhero.
I’m telling you this because I’ve have been to the other side of Superhero and I know what it looks like.
There came a point where my child WAS taller smarter, wiser, funnier, and outweighed me by 100 pounds and not only did he know it, but I knew it.
The neighbors knew it.
The postman knew it.
All I had to hold over him was, well, keys and a phone charger and my own sheer will because let’s face it, I wasn’t Wonder Woman anymore.
He didn’t follow orders because I said so. He questioned authority. He wanted to do what he wanted and it wasn’t anything like what I wanted.
He didn’t think I was a Superhero; he thought I was a Superzero.
At some point they’ll believe in your abilities and ideas about as much as they believe in the Easter Bunny and there you have it; you have gone from being a Superhero with all encompassing knowledge and strength to the Easter Bunny; silly, foolish and wearing a costume with rabbit ears.
When my son hit teen-hood, he left me for hours at a time and did, well, who knows what he did. I didn’t get to go or know unless I was willing to pay for a GPS tracer and a private detective and let’s remember I can’t really fly and I’m poor.
In those terrifying moments when you realize control is futile and all you have to fall back on is the groundwork you laid more than ten years ago when they looked at you with unadulterated awe you better hope you used that time wisely.
You better hope you didn’t let them run rampant over the main adult influence they had.
Did you teach them that there were actually boundaries and that they did have to follow rules like talking quietly in the library or sitting down the entire dinner with the family and eating?
Did you let them run you around like a short order cook, prisoner to their every gastronomical whim?
Did you teach them that if they threw a big enough tantrum that they would indeed get what they wanted at Target?
I hope not, because a tantrum at two might be bordering on amusing while a teenage tantrum with hormones is akin to a small hurricane.
So put on your tights and fasten yourself in your Bat mobile and take control, while you can.
It’s going to be a bumpy ride and it won’t be long till your not always in the driver’s seat.
It’s powerful stuff that hero worship, don’t waste it.
About Rebecca Suder