Co-written by Nicole Unice and Alex Iwashyna.
We met up at the Virginia Fine Arts Museum to get a sneak preview of Mummy: Secrets of the Tomb. The exhibit begins with a 21 minute long 3-D movie.
Us: OOH! Free glasses!
We are not photographers. We are writers, dammit.
The lights dim and Jean-Luc Picard begins to narrate Mummy: The Inside Story. And no, Nicole, did not realize who Patrick Stewart is, but we're still friends.
The Movie: Why is Ancient Egypt so fascinating?
Alex: The same reason social studies class never got past World War I?
Nicole: Past? I thought Ancient Egypt was before World War I. And do you think we can keep these glasses?
The Movie: Penis joke.
Alex: That was a penis joke.
Nicole: I think you should be the one who mentions it in the article.
We are next introduced to the mummy who is the star of the exhibit. Jean-Luc explains how through hieroglyphics, we know his name and occupation.
Nicole: How did this narrator learn hieroglyphics anyway?
Alex: He's using a Universal Translator. (It's hard being friends with non-Trekies.)
The Movie: His name is Nesperennub. Pronounced Nes-per-en-nub.
Alex: People think they can pronounce Iwashyna, too, but no one comes up with Ee-vah-shen-ah.
Nicole: My husband’s Russian ancestors were smart enough to cut their name to Unice. It used to have lots of extra letters in it, too, but most people still say YOU-NICE.
Alex: But you aren’t.
Nicole: Shut up.
Meet Nesperennub.
As the lights come up, we are ushered into the Egyptian exhibit.
Alex: Awesome. My kids could come with me next time and destroy a pot that survived 3000 years. That would be a new record for them.
Nicole: Well, for older kids, this could make the SOL’s more tolerable. Is there a hieroglyphic for SOL?
We ooh and ah over the real Nesperennub until Alex runs over to a giant Ankh, the symbol of life, and also of Alex’s adolescence.
Alex's was silver.
Alex: I wore those.
Nicole: Really? It’s a little big.
Alex: Not that one. But close. I also wore lots of eyeliner and didn’t shower much.
Nicole: How very Egyptian of you.
Alex: Shut up.
Nicole: You could try to bring the trend back. This statue could double as an amulet, if you got a big chain for it. Do they sell those here?
Yes, VMFA does. hinthint
Although you won't get our intrepid naration, we definitely recommend going to the Mummy: Secrets of the Tombexhibit, which runs from November 19th through March 11th, 2012. Anyone from upper elementary age to adult will enjoy it. Virginia Museum of Fine Arts is open daily from 10-5 and until 9 p.m. on Thursdays and Fridays. As always, admission is Free for VMFA members, children 6 and under, and active-duty military personnel and their immediate families.
Tickets are $15 for adults, $12 for seniors 65+, students with ID, adult groups of 10+ (after noon only), and youth ages 7–17 .Tickets can also be purchased by calling 804.340.1405.
Editor's note: There are super-cool programs for teachers, teens and more related to Mummy: Secrets of the Tomb.
