As I got into my car this morning to drive into work I nearly cried. I was so overcome with emotional on my first day back at work after having returned from last week’s family beach vacation in Nags Head, that I could barely hold back the tears… tears of pure JOY!
My son and I have a sweet moment at the beach.
Yes, you heard me right, JOY! I was so happy to be finally getting a break from my children I could not get out of the driveway soon enough. I can admit it, I needed a break from my family, and I needed it badly. There is no shame in admitting that for any mother because without a doubt, it is a fact that all mothers need a break from their family and children.
Motherhood is the hardest job any person can have. I have yet to see an exception to this fact. Often it is a 24/7 thankless job and especially for stay at home mothers, often there is no change of scenery or adult interaction. I stayed at home with my first son and I have searched the depths of my mind for any memory of my husband coming home and complimenting the way I folded the laundry or vacuumed the floors…there are no such memories.
I also felt very isolated from adult intellectual interaction, which I desperately needed to survive. I did try to participate in play dates with other moms, but rarely got away from the kiddies completely to go out with my girlfriends and relax. Eventually, all of this neglect for my own needs lead to a postpartum depression that took me years to fully recover from. If I could go back, I would have changed many things and I am hoping that after reading this if you see yourself within my example you can learn from my past missteps and get yourself back on track.
Motherhood is filled with many emotions like love, joy, and happiness. It is however exhausting and can be unrelenting on a physical and emotional level. It does not matter if you have one child or ten; you need a break and time for yourself. If you feel guilty taking the time away, try and put that aside because I assure you that a mother who is fresh mentally and physically is a better mother to her children and a better partner and friend to all of those who love her.
Remember that you were a woman before you were a mother. Take time to nurture the women that still resides within and the mother will shine through more brightly than ever.
So whither it is a weekly yoga class or lunch out with your friends take the time you need away from your family and children.
Also remember that showing your children that you take time for yourself will teach them to do the same as adults. Your children will live what they see day in day out from you, so show them how to take care of themselves by your own example.
As always ladies, I will shout it form the mountain top…..TAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF! If you don’t take care of yourself first you cannot take care of others. Taking care of your body, mind, and spirit will teach your children to do the same as they grow into the accomplished fulfilled adults we all strive to raise.
About Rebecca Muminovic
Excellant, and I totally agree, as mother's we always put ourselves last and family first and that's never good. I remember staying home with my second child for the first year and going back to work was like a vacation to me, loved the time but being a Mom is exhausting, as my son got older he actually told me I should take better care of myself and get a hobby because I was a nicer Mommy when I took care of me first, from the mouths of babes.:)