I Took a Risk

I walked into the small school library with a bit of apprehension and anxiety. As my eyes scanned the room, I immediately noticed that many of the library shelves were empty and there were a limited number of books available for students. There were two desktop computers to the right and an overhead projector to the left. About 10 round tables were positioned around the open area of the library, each with 4 chairs.

I put my bags of supplies on the floor as I thought about what this would be like. In less than 15 minutes, there would be 12-15 young teens entering the room. They were kids who were considered “difficult teens” by anyone’s standards. After being suspended and finally expelled from public school, they were enrolled in a special program. They came from a variety of backgrounds and personal situations, but they had one thing in common. They were no longer allowed to attend a traditional public school.

My contact at the school informed me that they would be escorted in by teachers and accompanied by a security guard. They were not allowed to have pencils except when in the classroom so I had brought pencils for them. She expected some to be less than cooperative and warned me that their attention span would be short. She said I might even be challenged on my own background and to be prepared without being intimidated. They sat 2-3 students and 1 teacher at each table.

What were my expectations? I expected this to be difficult, challenging, stressful and uncomfortable.

It was a privilege to be invited to present a 60-minute workshop on journaling to this group. My preparation included a review of historical figures who kept journals including Anne Frank, Adolf Hitler, and Franklin Roosevelt. But it also included research on modern-day stars and musicians who keep journals. Jay-Z, Madonna, Jennifer Lopez, and Bill Gates were just a few I found. My focus was to capture their interest and take it from there.

As the kids entered the room, their demeanor was just as my contact had described. To break the ice, I passed out home-baked cookies (thanks to Green Monkey Catering for donating those!), pretzels and bottled water. Before long, our class was in session.

There are way too many details about the hour to share in this article. But the most important thing to share is how these kids eventually warmed up (although very tepid for most), listened, and some even interacted throughout the workshop. Of course, some were more cooperative than others — but they were all well-behaved, and their desire and need for attention was so evident. They were surprised when I opened my box filled with blank journals and gave them all their own book to take home. Some were shy about taking a journal, while others were openly excited.

As they left the room, I tried to shake each person’s hand as they exited the library. Some shook my hand back, and others avoided any contact. When I started packing up the remaining papers and books, I felt a sense of sadness knowing that these kids had so much potential but had simply found themselves in this situation. I was sad knowing that the journals I had given them would likely find their way to a trash can before the day’s end and that everything we talked about would be forgotten.

But that was the risk I took.

Today I received a note from my contact at the school. She said that the kids talked about the workshop afterwards and brought up some things we had talked about. Some of them “took their books home and brought them back each day like they were a treasure to them” she said.  It seems that some of them may have a different perspective on writing now.

As I thought about the day, I realized that something wonderful had occurred. I went into this unusual situation to help the children and make a difference in their lives by sharing my time with them — but I also found that they helped me and made a difference in my life by sharing their lives with me. They reminded me that our youth are so precious, and all they really need is our love, time, support, and encouragement.

The kids in this class have tremendous potential — and I pray that they find a way to use it for good.

For now, I will enjoy this moment of knowing that maybe a glimmer of light shone through for some of them, turning a new page in their lives.