Rikki Dodson.
How do busy Richmond moms do it all?
We wondered about that too and so we went out to talk to some busy moms to find out. One of our interviews left us inspired and motivated to get more involved in the community – even when we already have a busy schedule filled with kids, housework, grocery shopping, husbands, church activities, friends, and more.
Rikki Dodson is a stay-at-home mom of three young children ages 7, 6, and 5. Just like any busy mom, she has clothes to wash, meals to cook, a house to clean, errands to run, carpools to coordinate, and dozens of other activities. But she also finds time to fit meaningful volunteer work into her life. She is the immediate outgoing President of the Junior League in Richmond, where she has been a member for more than a dozen years. This is an incredibly demanding volunteer position that is more like a full-time job at times!
We sat down with Rikki to find out how she does it.
RMOM: How does being a mom and volunteering work together?
Rikki: Volunteering actually helped prepare me for being a mom. But being a mom actually prepares you for volunteering too! You learn that you have to be organized, creative, and energetic as a mom – all the things you need for volunteering too. Being a mom requires multi-tasking and if you can be a mom, you can definitely be a volunteer too.
RMOM: When did you start volunteering with Junior League?
Rikki: I started volunteering years ago when I was working at the Martin Agency, which was also a demanding job. This was before kids and I was not married. I continued my work after we were married because I felt it was important. I stayed with it after my first child, even though I wondered how I would handle it all. But I already knew that you find time to do what is important and volunteering is important to me. I don’t think I will ever stop volunteering in the community in some way.
RMOM: How do you juggle all of the many responsibilities of being a busy mom of 3 and taking on something as demanding as President of the Junior League?
Rikki: The tricky thing is that my husband works a lot – he’s not home every day at 5:00 and he travels with his job. It was a combination of wonderful mother-friends and babysitters when I had board meetings — and of course great neighbors. I had tremendous support of neighbors across the street – the teenage girls babysit for me when I need it – and their parents are supportive too. I’m also very organized which comes from working at the Martin Agency and Capital One before becoming a mom. I think being so active in gymnastics in school and college also made me more disciplined and focused. When you train for hours a day for six days each week, you learn discipline. My training as a journalist prepared me for managing tight deadlines too. And of course, like any mom who works at home or out in public, I do a lot on weekends.
RMOM: How does your husband feel about all of the time you spend volunteering?
Rikki: My husband has been very supportive of me – he demonstrates his love for me by allowing me to serve in this role. Lots of women say they don’t have time but you always find time to do what is important. It was a great way to stay involved in something different as a stay-at-home mom, and it keeps my skill set up and even builds more knowledge and skills. His support and encouragement has really helped.
RMOM: Do you have a lot of other family support?
Rikki: Unfortunately I don’t have family anywhere close! My mother lives in Pennsylvania and is in poor health. My sisters live in other states and we’re all scattered around the country. My husband’s parents are deceased so my children don’t have the joy and benefit of having grandparents around. When you have family around you, you don’t realize how important that is in many ways. Family living nearby seems like such a simple thing, but if you’ve never had family living close to you, you adjust in other ways. I rely a lot on some great “mom friends” and of course, my fantastic babysitters across the street. Without family, you have to learn to adjust to other ways of finding support. The biggest problem is not having family when there are emergency situations. But we’ve adapted.
RMOM: How do you believe your children feel about your volunteer work?
Rikki: Seeing community needs and serving at high levels has rounded me out even more. This type of volunteer work is important for me and my children because it shows them how important it is to be active in the community and always find ways to help others. I believe I am setting a good example for them. I do hate those nights and weekends when I have to leave them at home with my husband or a babysitter to attend meetings, fundraisers and other events. But I also know that I am doing important work to help others and I am balancing my time with my family in a way that works for us. And I know that volunteering has helped me develop new skills and knowledge with so much more to offer to my kids too. They see it as part of life.
RMOM: What is the hardest part of volunteering so much?
Rikki: Selfishly, you feel that since you are already a mom, you’re giving enough of yourself right now. I don’t even have a housekeeper like a lot of my friends because I think I have to do it all myself. And then you have to also give as a leader. It’s hard to find where you have something and time for yourself. But even worse, it’s hard to feel okay doing something for myself instead of someone else. I’m always thinking through the kids’ activities, carpools, and sitters for the kids, and how to also be there for my husband. It can be overwhelming and you have to make a decision that this is what you want to do for the right reasons.
RMOM: What do you think is the greatest benefit of volunteering?
Rikki: Volunteering offers great rewards. My children get to see me involved in the community and helping people. They see the good from it and it’s a model for them. The norm should be you do something outside the home, no matter if you’re a stay-at-home mom or a mom who works outside the home. It has helped me develop myself in a different dimension while helping others in the community. I ask myself what skills I gained that I would not necessarily have thought I was going to gain. What can I get out of this? Make the most of it – Junior League offers so many opportunities to do so many things. Volunteering allows you to learn new skills you’ll get in no other way. When I’m ready to go back out into the working world outside my home, I’ll have more skills and knowledge than I had when I left it.
RMOM: Is there anything you want other Richmond moms to know about your views on volunteering?
Rikki: You can do it if you want to. By taking this role, I developed a whole new dimension of myself. Get involved and you’ll find the time.
Talking with Rikki was energizing and motivating. Throughout our conversation she would periodically pause to handle a situation with one of her three children. She spoke quietly, patiently and supportive with each question they asked. It was intriguing to watch her conduct this interview and interact with her children so effortlessly and lovingly.
Rikki encourages women to get out and serve the community – not necessarily in Junior League — though she welcomes that! But she points out that schools love to have moms come and read to kids once a week, help out in the library, and help in many different ways. The under-served population in the Richmond community is in such need of volunteers, especially schools in the East end of the city where parental participation is low. You don’t have to have a child attending a school to volunteer and make a difference either. Churches and other community organizations are searching for volunteers every day. Everyone has something to offer.
She left us with this thought:
“The real thing that women sometimes forget is that even though they’re making that sacrifice, the reward is greater. In the end, you will realize that it all comes back to you in a neat way.”
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