How to Find the Perfect Au Pair for Your Household

Finding the right au pair isn’t just about hiring extra help—it’s about welcoming someone into your home and making them part of your family. The right fit can bring incredible benefits, from cultural exchange to seamless childcare, while the wrong match can lead to frustration for everyone involved. But how do you make sure you find the best person for your household? Whether you’re looking for a responsible caregiver, a language-learning opportunity for your children, or an extra set of hands around the house, here’s how to make the right choice.

Choose a Good Au Pair Agency

A reputable au pair agency, like Go Au Pair, makes the entire process smoother by handling the heavy lifting—vetting candidates, verifying backgrounds, and ensuring compliance with visa requirements. The best agencies provide a well-curated selection of au pairs who meet your specific needs, from language skills to childcare experience.

Look for agencies that offer:

• Thorough screening – Background checks, reference verification, and interviews ensure candidates are qualified.
• Matching services – Good agencies don’t just send random candidates; they work with you to find the right personality and skillset for your family.
• Support throughout the placement – The best agencies provide ongoing assistance, helping you and the au pair adjust smoothly.
• Legal and visa guidance – They’ll handle the paperwork, ensuring everything is compliant with visa and labor laws.

Avoid agencies that seem disorganized, lack transparency, or pressure you into making a decision quickly. This is a big commitment—you want to get it right.

Define Your Needs Clearly

Before you even start looking, be clear about what you expect from your au pair. Think about:

• Daily responsibilities – Will they primarily provide childcare, or will they also help with light housework?
• Schedule and flexibility – Do you need someone full-time, part-time, or only during certain hours?
• Language and cultural preferences – Are you hoping for a specific language to be spoken with your kids?
• Personality fit – Do you need someone energetic to keep up with active children, or someone calm and patient?

Having a clear list of expectations will make it easier to communicate your needs and find a candidate who fits.

Review Profiles Carefully and Ask the Right Questions

Once you start receiving applications, take your time reviewing profiles. Pay attention to their childcare experience, personality traits, and interests. Then, set up video interviews to get a better sense of their communication style and attitude.

Some key questions to ask include:

• Why do you want to be an au pair?
• What experience do you have with children?
• How do you handle challenging behavior or tantrums?
• What would you do in an emergency situation?
• How do you feel about helping with household tasks beyond childcare?
• What do you like to do in your free time?

This conversation should feel natural—it’s not just about their answers but also about getting a sense of their personality. A great au pair should be responsible, adaptable, and genuinely enjoy working with kids.

Check References and Backgrounds

Even if a candidate seems perfect, always check their references. Speak with past host families or previous employers to understand their strengths, reliability, and work ethic. If an agency is handling background checks, confirm what’s included in their screening process. If you’re hiring independently, consider running your own background check for added peace of mind.

Red flags include vague or overly generic references, reluctance to provide past employer details, or inconsistent information. If something feels off, trust your instincts and keep looking.

Make Sure They Fit Your Family’s Dynamic

Skills and experience are essential, but personality fit is just as important. An au pair will be living in your home, so they should get along well with your family’s lifestyle and values. If possible, involve your children in the interview process—watch how they interact and whether there’s a natural connection.

Also, think about how they’ll integrate into your household:

• Do they have similar routines and habits?
• Will they be comfortable with your family’s structure, rules, and communication style?
• Are they independent enough to manage on their own during their free time?

Discuss Expectations Openly

Misunderstandings often arise from assumptions. From the beginning, be clear about:

Work schedule and responsibilities

Outline exact hours, duties, and what’s expected during their time off.

Household rules

Curfew, visitors, internet usage—whatever matters to you should be discussed upfront.

Parenting style

Make sure they understand how you handle discipline, routines, and daily life with your children.

A written agreement outlining these expectations can prevent future miscommunications.

Help Them Adjust to Life in Your Home

Once your au pair arrives, a smooth transition is key to a successful placement. Give them time to settle in, and provide guidance as they adjust. Show them around the neighborhood, introduce them to nearby au pairs, and establish a clear routine.

Providing ongoing support and feedback will help them feel confident in their role, and regular check-ins can ensure everyone stays happy with the arrangement.

Enjoy the Benefits of a Great Au Pair

When you take the time to find the right person, an au pair can become a valued part of your household. They bring new cultural experiences, language opportunities, and meaningful connections that can last a lifetime. By choosing wisely, setting clear expectations, and fostering a welcoming environment, you’ll set the foundation for a positive and enriching experience for both your family and your au pair.